Run down...

Catchy title huh?   Have you ever felt like you can't catch up?  I know you are nodding your head right now.  I can't seem to catch a breath, lately... without something new happening.  I'm so over this deployment.   I'm tired, I miss my man,  I'm trying of juggling everything... from the house, to finances, to sickness.  You often hear those words... "God doesn't give us anything we can't handle".  I get that, but goodness gracious,  UNCLE!

Sophi is dealing with her fever virus once again.  This has been going on monthly since July of last year.  I've changed pediatricians, and we're awaiting our follow up appointment with her immunologist next week.  I can't pray hard enough, that this Dr. gives us some reassurance and some answers.  When you hear your 4 year old mutter the words... "Momma, I'm so tired of this happening every month," you want to just take it all away! 

I've been having some medical issues personally.  So many things since moving to Ms, I just want to ask God... why?  Is it this state?  Only kidding, my friends who are reading this.  Is it the stress we've been under?  Why, I'm only 41.  I feel like I have aged 10 years in the past few years.  I want answers for myself, and want to know how to fix things.  I'm a fixer... I don't do good when I can't fix "broken" things. 

So as I am writing this...  I caught myself texting hubby, "Can we please swap places for a week?"  Knowing I wouldn't survive an hour doing what he does, not alone be able to live out of a tent for months on end.  I realize, how selfish I am...  Everyone has things that happen from time to time.  When things aren't going our way, or have illnesses that wear you down, it's easy to fall apart.  I must remember tomorrow is a new day, and the sun always rises! 

So in closing....  Looking to hire the following.....

Personal Doctor who can make our daughter better.
Personal Doctor who can take my medical issues away.
Someone who is willing to leave their family and work in a not so pleasant atmosphere to free up my hubby, so he can come home.
Personal cook
Personal accountant to pay bills, handle calls, handle rental property.... etc.  You get the picture.
Personal errand runner, this includes all grocery shopping. 
Personal maid.

That should do it... I don't ask for much

Need to get over this hurdle and push through as they say.  Deployments sucks, I need my man here to help me.  Slowly feeling defeated and I hate this feeling.  This too shall pass, I know it will.  God, is hearing me and knows my needs.  Thankful he can carry me through.